a series of irrelevant thoughts that has all started by "him"
I’m not against him. I distant myself that’s all. I don’t mean to harm him. I just don’t want to harm myself. But how can I explain such thing to a person who doesn’t bother to listen? It’s as if I’m having this illusion all by myself... Could I be fooling myself? or am I exaggerating? Is there anything to fight for? Is there a fight at the first place? or is it my mind? oh, what a mind... It’s bad to have a mind of your own. I mean this mind that wanders outside the boxes and questions what’s visioned as stigma. It suffers a lot. You suffer a lot. You talk but people don’t listen, or maybe it’s actually them who talk but you who don’t get them. I don’t know. I don’t know where the problem comes from. Is it me or is it them? is it the mind? or is it the soul? Certain people believe that some of us are meant to stand alone and fight alone through this life. isn’t it just too harsh? and why would there be a specific group that shall suffer for all others? is this a privilege? a sign that they are different and that they “stand out”? or is it a curse? and a sign that they are doomed for life?
but why extremes. how about thinking that they are different in so many ways that they hardly fit in society. but what society? and why don’t they fit in are the 2 most important questions. sometimes the society is your house, or just your out-house life. it depends. you know that some blah-blah scientists argue that the out-house life is the hardest since there are too many pressures on the individual, for instance peer pressure. It’s funny what a man is ready to give up and change about himself only to fit in a stupid stratification system that is a failure on every single level. weird ha? what’s weirder that we all do it unconsciously in order to survive. because if i don’t fit where i live, where can i love to fit? and the question remains unanswered... it’s unanswered not because there is no answer, but because the answer is too shameful and de-priding. yes. we fail to fit. we all keep trying to “blend in” that we eventually all fall out, out of ourselves. we create these new personalities that insulate us from social atrocities, however we still find ourselves tripping in them. have you ever wondered why? we have already taken all the possible precautions, but still in vain...
but why extremes. how about thinking that they are different in so many ways that they hardly fit in society. but what society? and why don’t they fit in are the 2 most important questions. sometimes the society is your house, or just your out-house life. it depends. you know that some blah-blah scientists argue that the out-house life is the hardest since there are too many pressures on the individual, for instance peer pressure. It’s funny what a man is ready to give up and change about himself only to fit in a stupid stratification system that is a failure on every single level. weird ha? what’s weirder that we all do it unconsciously in order to survive. because if i don’t fit where i live, where can i love to fit? and the question remains unanswered... it’s unanswered not because there is no answer, but because the answer is too shameful and de-priding. yes. we fail to fit. we all keep trying to “blend in” that we eventually all fall out, out of ourselves. we create these new personalities that insulate us from social atrocities, however we still find ourselves tripping in them. have you ever wondered why? we have already taken all the possible precautions, but still in vain...
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